Once you’ve broken the cycle of toxicity, grieved the losses you needed to grieve and healed the wounds that need to heal, there is a beautiful life waiting for you to discover. A beautiful life, I like to call the GLOW UP. Break ups and heartbreak are never easy, but on the other side of heartbreak lies the opportunity for a re-imagined life that is filled with your deepest dreams and desires. Never fear heartbreak. Fear staying stuck in a situation that prevents you from being the greatest, most authentic version of yourself.

Season One Remix, Episode 1.7 of the Sugar Free Podcast, Navigating Real Heartbreak Pt. II: Grieving, Growing, Glowing breaks down the journey towards a healthier, happier and more fulfilled life after healing from some a really painful breakup. Join Syd as she sits down with Life Coach and Attorney, Daphne McGee, for a conversation on how to identify and break toxic cycles to engage in healthier, happier relationships with yourself and others to lessen the occurrence and pain of heartbreak.

Daphne is a legal aid attorney and owner of Golden Daph Life Coaching. Daphne helps people leaving harmful situations move forward with clarity and confidence. Daphne also blogs about her experiences with marriage, divorce, and faith deconstruction.

Want to work with Daphne? Daphne is offering all Sugar Free Podcast listeners an EXTRA coaching session for FREE if they mention “SUGAR FREE” when booking their session. This means Sugar Free listeners will get 7 coaching sessions instead of the standard six sessions that come in Daphne’s standard package. Shoot Daphne a message on IG @goldendaph for more details.

If you want to learn more about Daphne or read her blog, you can find her at www.goldendaph.com.

Show Notes

Grieving the loss of a relationship

• It is okay, normal and healthy to grieve the loss of a relationship, even if the relationship wasn’t good.
• When you lose a relationship, you may be losing companionship, financial stability, future dreams, future children, community,  your current family structure…etc. and you are allowed and encouraged to grieve those losses.
• For Daphne, much of the healing and grieving process happened during the relationship once she realized the relationship wasn’t what she wanted.

Grieving the loss of Community in the Church

• After grieving the loss of the church, Daphne had to confront her relationship with the church and decide whether she could remain in community and in fellowship with people and ideas that didn’t support her decision for divorce
• Decided she needed to seek a religion and religious community that allowed her space to care for herself, allowed others to care for her and allowed her to make decisions that were best for her life, her goals, her dreams and mental health

Navigating heartbreak in your Career

• You can do “everything right” (i.e. go to college, join all the clubs, get all the awards, participate in all the internship programs…etc.) and still not be guaranteed the life that you want.
• There is no reward “for doing everything right.” A more fulfilled life comes from doing what you WANT to do vs. what you think you SHOULD be doing

The other Side of Heartbreak

• Heartbreak provides an opportunity for a renewed life
• You should start by figuring out EXACTLY what you want your life to look like
• Give yourself permission to indulge ALL of your heart’s deepest desires
• Give yourself permission to change your mind about the things that you want.

Breaking the Cycle

• You must first recognize and understand what about that toxic situation was attractive to you
• Until you change your mindset and your view of what you want, you will continue on the same cycle of toxicity with a new partner
• Seek counseling and/or life coaching to assist you on your journey