Happy Valentine’s Day Lovers!! Love is hard to find no matter who you are; but many women of color say that for them, finding a partner is a tad more difficult. Fortunately, we believe that hope is not lost. We ALL have the ability to find the love that we deserve, we just need the right bait.
Finding love is all about having the right mindset, the right tools, the right moves and most importantly THE RIGHT PICKER. The goal is to pick men who provide, protect, support, uplift and make you a priority. These attributes are what this week’s guest describes as characteristics of a “high-value” partner. Who doesn’t need one of those?
This week, join Syd as she sits down with dating coach, Keshia Rice, for a conversation on how to search for love in all the RIGHT places in Season Two Episode 5 Making Room for Love Part I: How to Find Love in a High Value Partner.
Keshia Rice is a dating coach and two-time Emmy-nominated journalist. As a coach, Keshia helps successful, Christian women learn how to attract quality men without compromising their values, identity, or sanity.
Want to work with Keshia?
Take her course: https://keshia-rice.mykajabi.com/ (Use code SUGARFREE for 25% off)
Visit her website: Keshiarice.com
Follow her on Instagram: @KeshiaRice
Follow her on Facebook: thekeshiarice
What is a “high value” partner?
A high value man is a provider, someone who makes you feel safe mentally, emotionally and physically. A high value man is financially stable, makes sacrifices, makes you a priority in his life and puts family first.
Toxic men are boys who engage in attention-seeking behaviors. Attention seeking behaviors include flirting with other women, asking for money frequently, seeking praise or validation constantly and/or complaining incessantly ….etc. If your man acts more like he’s three years old and less like he’s 30 years old, then he is a toxic partner.
A high value man is not the same as a high-earning man. A high earning man makes a lot of money and often times money is the only thing he has to offer.
What’s the key to finding a high value partner?
The key to finding a high value partner is finding yourself first. You must know yourself so that you can easily identify partners who can give you what you want and communicate to them clearly and accurately your specific needs.
The following are steps to finding a high value partner:
Step 1: You must recognize your own patterns.
Most of your insecurities stem from past traumas and/or childhood. You MUST commit to doing the inner work required to fix yourself and heal your past traumas so that you can attract a whole, healed and supportive partner.
Step 2: Make yourself Available
Physical Availability— Online dating is a great place to meet people. You may also need to go out more, specifically to places where you can find the type of partner you want to attract.
Some Tips for making yourself more available:
- When online dating, set your location to where you believe your potential partner might be. For example, set your location to the more affluent area of town, if that’s where you think your potential partner lives or hangs out.
- When you go to the grocery store or Target, go to the fancy target or grocery to increase the likelihood of finding the man that you’re looking for.
- Wear clothes that you wouldn’t mind your future potential partner seeing you in.
Emotional availability—You must make yourself emotionally available to receive the love you want to attract. This means doing your inner work to heal yourself and cultivating a positive outlook on dating in general by being mindful of the content you consume and the people who you allow to poor into you. For example, if you’re always listening to sad songs that claim, “men are dogs,” you are far more likely to find men who are dogs. You will find whatever you are actively looking for.
Step 3: Set Boundaries and Communicate Them
Know your deal breakers so that you can communicate those and allow men who cannot meet those expectations with opportunities to de-select themselves.
Step 4: Allow Men to be Men
If you treat a man like a child, even a high-value man, he will act like a child. Don’t get in the habit of doing and being everything for your partner. Allow them the space to do and figure things out on their own. This will help them to be a better, more supportive partner to you when you need help.
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Hosts & Guests
Sydnee Mack (Host)
Keshia Rice (Guest)
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